So Let Go My Soul

I am afraid it is time for a dose of reality. 

My parents have sold their house.  

I grew up here. I began staying over immediately and progressively from the age of three to six I moved in full time as my Mom and Dad were unable to care for me and my little sister. We painted my room six times, and rearranged the furniture 167 times.  My grandpa helped me to ride a bike, shushed my sleepovers, made Minnie Mouse pancakes, played catch in the front yard, and taught me how to pick and complete my March Madness bracket from the Sunday paper. My grandma spent hours washing, brushing, braiding or rolling my hair in rollers, used her heart and hands to teach me how to cook family meals handed down generations and new adventurous recipes clipped from the newspaper. They teased me for locking myself out, constantly, and they took my door off the hinges for slamming it one too many times. They tucked me in as a little girl in my big bed, cheered every time I came barreling through the kitchen with some piece of great news or accomplishment, and they held me on the edge of their bed when my heart was broken. But mostly we did homework, watched Jeopardy, and sang under the stars in the hot tub. I think by now that it's clear the memories made in the last twenty nine years are imprinted in my character, my being, my heart, and the depths of my soul. And these are just my memories. I have siblings. And a large family, and an even bigger extended family, and to add to that all our friends that became family. So much life was lived in one home, so much love grew and was poured on all who were there. 

Granddaughters Brittney (2) and Cassey (5) Summer 1990

But it wasn't the house that made the memories. It was the family. It was my parents. They made it our home. I don't think my heart could contain any additional gratitude, pride, or love for what they have done there the last 29 years. But it is time to let go. It is time to move on. 

Just over a year ago, my grandma Judi was diagnosed with moderate/severe dementia and early Alzheimer's disease. First the good, she is in the early stages, she is responding well to new medications to aide focus and reduce anxiety. She may not be able to solve calculus or give great driving directions, but thankfully she still knows that I don't like mayonnaise on my sandwiches or that my sister is just months away from completing her masters degree to be an elementary teacher. She still knows and can recall the important stuff, for that we are all extremely grateful. Her health and her mind are a gift, one that we don't want to take for granted. Someday the Alzheimer's may come full force, but we cannot live our life in fear of that day. We can only celebrate every day that we still have her present. 

Granddaughter Brittney's College Graduation 2017

My parents have been aging, and that is no picnic to go through or watch. So just as I am always asking myself if there is anything I can do to help my children to be healthier, I have to ask myself the same for my parents. Evaluating the things that they need to be healthy I found myself comparing medicare plans, supplement plans, diets, prescription coverage etc. just trying to find the right concoction to reduce stress, increase relaxation, and allow them to enjoy this phase in their life. But it wasn't in a medical solution that we found the answer. 

It was baseball. And sunshine. And no stress. And the concept of being financially free. And a slower pace. It was a new home, in a new state. After my parents went on a two week vacation in Arizona for Dodger spring training it was clear that they came home healthier, happier, and closer than I had seen in awhile. It was refreshing and exciting. 

Catching a spring training game, go Dodgers!

Visiting the Grand Canyon.

Their current house was already on the market, it is too big, with a plot of land that requires upkeep. They equity was tied up, and they house was over 60 years and aging right along with them. They were already looking to downsize, but none of us expected that journey to take them out of state. They have family here, children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren, siblings, nieces, nephews, and a lifetimes worth of friends. They have a life here, a good life. 


They also have a good life awaiting in Arizona. They have a brand new house with all the upgrades, all the amenities, and none of the financial stress. Dry heat is one of the best medicines for arthritis and joint pain. Vitamin D and sunshine is proven to reduce depression and encourage activity. A clean slate is there for them to expand their community, to share their love with others, to create a new home. 


This is going to be hard for all of us. 
We can talk about all the future trips planned, the new memories to make. However, we are doing ourselves a disservice if we don't acknowledge and grieve a place that was the epicenter of our lives. My background is in finance and lending, so I have been the point person for the sale of this home and the purchase of the new home is Arizona. Staying busy with those details have kept me distracted. Just like packing, sorting, purging, and preparing for an estate sale has kept my parents, my mom, my aunts, and cousins busy. (My grandmother constructed a mini, eclectic, museum of sorts over the last three decades!) So we have all just pushed the reality of this to the back burner. I need to say it though. My heart is broken. I'm nervous for the future. Change is coming rapidly. Distance will make it harder to follow my grandmothers health as closely as I do now. FaceTime will become our best friend. None of that is enough though to negate the positives and the excitement of the adventure that lies before them. So I will choose to grieve for a moment, but to focus on the goodness, the provision of a new home, an answered prayer to relieve their stress. 

"So let go, my soul, and trust in Him. The waves and wind still know His name."

Congratulations to my parents on your retirement. You deserve all the joy, happiness, and love that your hearts can hold. And don't worry I'll pick a color scheme for my room in Arizona soon!

New home is Maricopa, Arizona!